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✍️✍️✍️✍️ Hellbound With You Chapter 186 - 190 ✍️✍️✍️✍️


Chapter 186 Selfish desire

Dark, ominous clouds seemed to have quickly gathered in Alex's eyes as soon as he heard the words that came out of Abi's mouth. The atmosphere became frozen cold, as if the ice king had finally awakened from its long slumber.

His eyes dilated as his dark orbs turned even darker, so dark that Abi couldn't decipher anything anymore in those eyes of his. Abi felt goosebumps crawl up her arms and her neck and she shivered subconsciously. His coldness normally didn't get to her but at that moment, she felt the chill he was emanating seep into her heart, along with the feeling of intense agony at what she had to do.

"I'm sorry…" she uttered once again. Her heart felt like it was being cut into a million pieces. Abi didn't know that heartbreak felt like this. Now that Alex was standing right before her, the pain had become even more unbearable.

She had read it in many novels that love wasn't all sunshine and rainbows, that if you love, you should be ready to get hurt. When she read those novels, she realised that every love story was a tragedy and that love and pain were both sides of the same coin. She thought that these were all true because her dad was a prime example of having felt the deepest love and in turn, the deepest sorrow.

Her father loved her mother so much that he suffered so much pain and she knew that even until this day, he still felt it whenever he is reminded of her. She saw, in his eyes, the loneliness, the longing and the sadness at being parted from the woman he loved. She saw it in the way he would look at her photo and gaze into the distance with unseeing eyes. She saw the torment he went through every single day of his life.

But it appeared that she didn't really understand the extent of pain that resulted from loving someone, until that very moment. She underestimated the pain, the agony, and now she felt like these feelings were eating her alive.

This made Abi think about her dad. If breaking up with someone you adored and loved so much felt like this, how much more would it be to lose that person forever?

She tried putting herself in her father's shoes and thought that she couldn't probably survive such pain. Thinking about it made Abi shiver in fear deep within her. When she looked at Alex, she only thought about one thing – that this man, her beautiful jellyfish, her Alex, didn't deserve such pain.

This pain she felt right now, Abi thought she could handle it, as long as Alex didn't suffer with her. Her selfishness should end here, tonight.

Abi lifted her hands and removed the necklace. She stared at the emerald ring in her hand and her fingers trembled a little. She remembered how happy she was last night. That moment when he put the ring on her finger was so magical and she would never forget it until her very last breath. She thought that that precious moment would be enough to carry her through. She should be content now because she really was so lucky to have experienced something like that, so lucky that Alex had given so many memories for her to look back on until her last breath. She knew she was still the luckiest girl alive right now, for meeting this man.

With an intensely heavy heart, Abi held his hand and slowly lifted it up. She put the ring in his palm before she looked into his eyes.

"I'm sorry… I finally realized that I am asking for too much. I've been so selfish since the day I met you. I guess, you've pampered me so much I became so lost in my beautiful delusions to the point that I was even prepared to treat marriage as something I could go through just because I wished to. That was just my selfish desires. I'm sorry for being so selfish since the beginning. And I'm so sorry for being selfish again and wanting to quit now," she said as she slowly retracted her hand.

And then, she smiled at him, the saddest smile she ever made. "I'm so sorry. Thank you for everything." Her voice cracked. "Goodbye, Alex." I love you so much… and I will keep on loving you forever…

After those words left her mouth, Abi turned away, opened the door and ran outside, leaving Alex frozen as his eyes just stared at the now closed door.

Abi's tears finally burst as soon as she stepped out of the door. Her eyes were clouded as she dashed out that she didn't see Zeke walking towards the door.

The tears were like water gushing out of a broken dam, nearly impossible for her to stop.

She bumped into Zeke and the man held her by her shoulders, steadying her.

He looked at Abi's tortured expression along with the tears flowing out of her eyes and his grip on her slightly tightened.

Abi pulled away from him and ran towards the road.

Zeke looked at the closed door like he was waiting for someone to come out. But when no one came out, Zeke sighed and his gaze immediately fell on Kai who was looking worried to death as he looked at Abi's disappearing silhouette.

"Kai, go follow her. Bring her home and make sure to watch over her," Zeke ordered and Kai glared at him.

"This… this is all your fault, right? Are you happy now, seeing Abigail breakdown like that?" Kai told him and Zeke quickly moved closer to him, grabbed his shoulder and leaned in on him.

"You will understand everything when the time comes. Everything I do and everything I have done has been for one purpose, so stop blabbering and just do what I say," he said with his authoritative voice and Kai could only press his lips tight in hard line as he clenched his fists into tight balls before he ran towards his car and chased after Abi.

Chapter 187 Just admit it

Alex was still standing in the very same position where Abi left him when Zeke entered the house. His eyes were blank, dark and frozen cold.

Zeke stared at him but the man didn't even seem to notice him. It wasn't until Zeke spoke to him that he was brought back to the present.

"You're really not going to go after her?" Zeke asked, as composed and as emotionless as ever.

Finally, Alex moved as his head raised to look at Zeke. Then he stared at the ring in his palm for another long while, seemingly falling back into the abyss. He cleared his throat and shook his head and he seemed to have finally jolted back to reality but his first reaction was a forced sardonic laugh.

And then, too soon, his laughter evaporated from his cold face. He clenched his fist tightly, his knuckles turning white in the process, as if he wanted to crush the ring inside it into dust. His cold eyes brimmed with deadness. He started to coat himself with his coldness, like it was some protective permafrost, closing it around him, isolating him again from the world.

The next moment, he turned and looked at Zeke with a wicked smile forming on his face.

"Go after her?" he shook his head, his unpleasant smile not fading. "When have I ever chased after anyone? Huh? Zeke?" he uttered and the ever so expressionless Zeke frowned, obviously bemused.

"Abigail is…" Alex started again. There was no warmth in his voice as he uttered her name nor any glimmer of light in his eyes. "She finally woke up. She finally heeded the danger signs that have been flashing in front of her this whole time. She's indeed an amazing little lamb." He was nodding as he said that, as if he was silently saying that Abigail did the right thing in finally leaving him.

Zeke didn't say anything more and just stared at him with displeasure while Alex nonchalantly loosened his tie and walked towards the grand staircase without another word.

Zeke watched the man ascending the staircase like nothing had happened and his frown became even deeper. He sat by the fireplace, staring at the stairs as he rested his face on his knuckles. He looked like he was plotting something serious.

After an indefinite amount of time, the entrance door opened and Xavier emerged along with Dianne. The woman was dressed in a seductive fiery red dress, excitement flashing in her eyes. She didn't bother to say hello to Zeke and immediately headed to the third floor.

Zeke just quietly watched the woman walk up the stairs with a meaningful smile on her face, while Xavier walked over to where Zeke was and sat next to him, heaving a deep sigh.

"Now what the hell's going on? Dianne said that Alex called her," he said but when he received no response, he just sighed again.

To ease his boredom, Xavier brought out his phone and played a game but a round hadn't even ended yet when they heard the sound of stomping heels descending the stairs in haste.

Xavier immediately stood up upon seeing the beautiful and confident woman who had just walked upstairs minutes ago, now looking mean and upset. Her face was nearly distorted by her sullen and grumpy expression.

"Hey, what happened?" Xavier asked her and the woman almost yelled at him in frustration.

"I don't know!" She shook her head in disbelief and anger. "He called me to come here… just for him to shun me away like he was disgusted by me!"

Xavier looked at her, with the words 'idiot, did you not learn your lesson last time'?

"He asked me to come. He asked me to touch him!" Dianne retorted, realizing the meaning behind Xavier's gaze.

What she said then surprised Xavier.

"Oh, he asked you to come and be intimate with him but once you did, he threw you out?" he repeated in disbelief and Dianne gritted her teeth, feeling humiliated.

"Something's wrong with him! He cursed and then ordered me to leave. Something seems to be bothering him, like he's going crazy about something! Just what the hell happened to him?"

Xavier's eyes flew towards Zeke, asking lots of questions. When Dianne saw that the man had no idea what was going as well, she snarled and left the house.

Upstairs, Alex was drenching himself under the cold blast of the shower.

His eyes were frozen and his fists were clenched into tight balls. He raised his face to the streaming water. He looked like he was asking the water to wash away something but time passed and his dark expression didn't change. The cold water didn't seem to be working at all. He hit the marble walls hard and switched off the water. He stepped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist and hair still dripping wet.

He entered his pitch black room. It was cavernous, hollow and lifeless. But there was one thing that was out of place, the only colorful thing inside. The jellyfish plushie Abigail gave him.

Alex's jaws clenched upon the sight of it. Images began to appear in his head and he reached out his hand to touch it but he stopped midway, gnashed his teeth before he hurriedly got dressed and stepped out of his room.

Zeke was still sitting in the same spot when he saw Alex, already dressed up and ready to leave.

"Where are you going?" Zeke asked but Alex gave him another sardonic smile.

"Wanna come with me?" he asked, his lifeless eyes looking at him meaningfully.

Zeke could already tell where he was planning to go and he finally stood up and faced him with all seriousness as he spoke.

"Alex, even if you go there, it'll be the same. You can't touch anyone because all you want is Abigail. You can't get her off your mind. You want her back because you've fallen for her Alex. Just admit it." Zeke said and the man who was going to leave the house, halted in his tracks and froze.

Chapter 188 Three reasons

Abi had arrived home late in the night and was glad that her grandparents were already asleep. Her father was the one who let her inside.

Andrew saw her puffy, red eyes but all he asked was if she was alright. Abi told him she was fine, that she was just a little upset and her dad didn't ask anymore. He looked like he understood her and he just led her to her room, telling her to have a rest.

Abi tried to sleep and she did after a few hours of sobbing quietly, but she woke up at 3 am and started crying again. She couldn't go back to sleep again because her mind was too chaotic, with so many thoughts running around like headless chickens, so she stood up and opened the window. The moon was no longer there. No stars even. The sky was dark, as hollow and lifeless as her insides.

She sank slowly to the floor and hugged her knees with her head down. What had she done? When will this pain stop? Will she be able to see him again? Will he hate her for what she did? She knew that she had to do what needed to be done but she still had many doubts. Maybe she shouldn't have started this. If only she knew it would end up like this!

She didn't know how long she stayed there, sitting in that pitiful fetal position.

The cold wind was blowing, but she couldn't care less.

But then, she began to feel something different in the air. She felt a familiar chill and it wasn't because of the cold wind. Abi's dying heart began to palpitate. She didn't lift her face to look because she was afraid that it was all in her imagination.

However, as she remained there, paralyzed, that deep seraphic voice echoed in her ears.

"What are you doing?" he asked, his voice deep and calm and Abi finally looked up.

Her mouth hung open when she saw that Alex was there, just outside the window. He was standing on a small balcony connecting through to her father's room on the other side of the house. He was there and he seemed so real as he looked at her.

Abi slowly stood up, her face filled with disbelief.

"A-alex?" she called out, obviously questioning if what she was seeing was real or not.

"Did a nightmare wake you up again?" he asked again. It was dark and she could hardly see his expressions but she could hear the unusual tenseness in his voice.

Abi slowly shook her head. "I… didn't have a nightmare tonight," she told him honestly, still looking at him with disbelief. She then ran towards her door and switched the lights on.

When she looked at the window again, Alex was climbing inside through the window and Abi froze in place. It really was him, her Alex. But why?

"What… why are you here?" she asked, her voice weak.

Alex stared at her and then he turned away with a far-off gaze in his eyes that vanished almost as quickly as it came.

"I don't know," was all he replied, his voice had become a soft murmur. For the first time, Alex looked meek and helpless. She had never seen him look that way before and it was taking all of her self control not to reach out and touch him, and embrace him tightly.

Abi didn't know what to say. She looked back at him with a million questions in her eyes but she was afraid to speak again because she was afraid that the tears that were threatening to spill over would gush out and she would lose control of herself.

He looked like he was waiting for her to speak, and when she didn't, he began to step closer to her. Abi felt her heart ramming against her chest, and her heartbeats drumming in her ears.

He looked at her thoughtfully for a few seconds before he opened his lips again. "I'm not sure how I ended up here but…" He hesitated, looking for the right word. "I think I came here for three reasons."

He looked at her thoughtfully for a few seconds before he continued. "First reason… I think I've gone crazy from the moment you left."

Abi gaped at him. His voice as he said those words stabbed at her heart. Her throat clenched in pain and clouds of fear began to form inside her.

"Second… I came to ask something. How did you know that you've fallen in love with me?" He blinked, studying her intently as if he was searching for the truth in her eyes.

But Abi couldn't speak. Her head was spinning at the rapid change in direction of the things he was saying. Why? Why was he suddenly asking her all of these?

When Abi's pale lips didn't open to speak, Alex continued talking after a moment passed by, as he seemingly assembled his thoughts.

"Was it because you realized all you ever wanted was to be with me? Was it because you just couldn't get me out of your head no matter what you do? Was it because you realized that you no longer want anything or anyone else but me?"

He watched her face closely, keenly looking for the silent answers from her expression as she digested everything he just said. And the answer she gave him was her tears falling from her eyes. Her lips trembled and the silent tears fell one after another. That reaction was enough for Alex. This little lamb was easy to read sometimes after all.

Alex's eyes scorched beneath his gorgeous lashes. He gently wiped away her falling tears with his thumb. He smiled like he was in utter disbelief about what he was doing and then his next words tumbled out.

"I think I am feeling the same thing you are and this damn thing is driving me insane right now… I think this is what you call, being in love."

Chapter 189 The third reason

Panic started to etch on Abi's face.

Tears pooled in her eyes again, glistening on her long dark lashes before they flowed endlessly. She shook her head at him like she was in denial.

She tried to open her lips but they just trembled. It was so hard to speak. She felt like she was choking for air.

"No, Alex. Y-you said you don't do love. You said you would never... fall in love… with anyone…" she stammered, her voice raw with both pain and disbelief. This was it, her greatest happiness and greatest fear.

No… he can't fall for her. He can't love her!

Alex smiled half a smile but his eyes became unbelievably tender.

"Well, I did say that and I meant it back then... I have never felt anything like this before. I was certain that I was not capable of feeling anything like this but…" He looked at her thoughtfully for a few seconds, before he picked up one of her hands and pressed it lightly to his face. And then he smiled and half bit his lower lip. She'd never seen him struggle so hard for words. "I… I don't know what happened, Abigail. I just know that I won't be able to bear it if you leave me."

He held her hands tightly and then he held her face with both his hands, his thumbs wiping her tears away as he gently bumped his forehead on hers.

"That's why I came here… to get you to come back, to be with me again. That's the third reason why I'm here. Don't worry, you won't have any reason to be scared anymore because everyone who harmed you, or are trying to harm you, are all gone. I've dealt with all of them tonight. No one will harm you again because I will protect you," he promised, his eyes burning with certainty, almost like a knight or a king pledging to protect his queen.

It was then that Abi finally noticed the drops of red, that looked to be blood, splashed all over his neck and on the sleeves of his shirt. His hair was damp and his clothes seemed to be as well.

"So come back home with me, Abigail," he asked, his voice almost pleading as he pulled her into his embrace.

But Abi just sobbed even harder after hearing all the words he uttered. And she couldn't stop.

"Please…" she uttered between her sobs when suddenly, someone knocked on the door.

"Abi? Are you alright? Please open the door."

Andrew's voice startled the two of them and they stared at the door.

"D-dad? I'm fine." Abi forced herself to speak even though her voice cracked. She couldn't let her father see Alex here. No, she couldn't let him see Alex with all this blood on him.

Panicking, Abi looked at Alex, still sniffling as she forced herself to stop crying.

"Alex, please –"

Before Abi could tell him to leave, Alex suddenly bent down and kissed her. It was quick but was gentle and emotional.

"I'll go and get changed," he said, and then he gave her another quick kiss before he ran to the window and disappeared.

"Abi," Andrew called out again, jolting Abi back to reality.

She hastily opened the door and her father's extremely worried face welcomed her.

The man was surprised at his daughter's wounded expression.

"Abi, what happened?" he asked and Abi hugged him and cried again. She didn't know how many more tears she had left in her. She felt like all she had done that night was cry her eyes out.

"Dad, what should I do? What should I do? Alex… he said he's fallen in love with me, dad," she told him as she trembled in his arms. She couldn't even smile and feel happy that the man she loved had actually just confessed to her. The man she loved actually said he loved her, too! This should have been one of the happiest moments of her life but here she was, bawling her eyes out because she knew what was waiting ahead of him.

"Dad, I don't know what to do. I don't want to hurt Alex, dad. I don't want to make him… I don't want him to suffer because of me. I love him so much. I don't want him to go through all that pain."

Andrew was heartbroken as he felt his daughter tremble in his embrace. He didn't know that his daughter's anxiety and phobia was worse than he thought. He could see her intense fear and he felt bad because he knew he was the reason his daughter was now like this.

Alex arrived at his mansion in a hurry. He even ignored the men who approached him to ask where he had just come from.

He simply dashed upstairs to his room but everyone noticed he no longer looked like a dead fish who had given up on life. Even though he didn't say a word, they could tell simply because his dark aura that had been raging like a typhoon was nowhere to be felt.

Xavier and Kai looked at each other before their gaze fell on the nonchalant man sitting quietly on the chair in the room.

It seemed that the storm had ended. Or maybe not?

Minutes went by and Alex finally emerged from upstairs.

The three guys waiting for him looked at him and they all fell speechless.

Alex was wearing his finest suit?! What? Where the hell was he going?

They watched him gracefully walk towards the door, almost sparkling with all his unreal gorgeousness. None of them dared to call out his name to get the sparkly man's attention. Well, Xavier who used to be the only one who always dared, was now too scared because what he saw that night was now engraved in his mind. He didn't want to do anything that might trigger the now sleeping dark dragon.

However, to their surprise, Alex halted and looked at them so seriously before he walked over to the trio.

His gaze fell on Xavier.

"Tell me, what should I bring?"


"To Abigail. She was very upset and crying when I left her. I think I should bring her something to cheer her up. So, tell me, what do you think is the best thing I could bring to cheer her up?"

Xavier could only gape at him, eyes wide in utter disbelief.

After a few seconds, when Xavier couldn't say anything because he was still dumbstruck, Alex's mouth twitched and he impatiently left.
Chapter 190: Home

"Holy cow! W-was that really Alex?!" Xavier yelled in disbelief. He couldn't believe this was the same man from last night! His mind was totally blown!

"Sigh... I can't believe he couldn't even last for one night." Kai shook his head. He had expected that it might take some time for Alex to realize or accept that he was in love with Abigail. He even braced himself for the coming madness that would definitely occur during their separation. He thought that Alex would stubbornly deny all the foreign emotions that were already growing inside him without him knowing until he blew up and couldn't take it anymore. But it appeared he was clearly mistaken.

After his overnight madness, it seemed he had come to the answer by himself. Kai knew that he mercilessly went as far as torturing Eli to death, probably so he could distract himself, but that obviously didn't work and he became even more crazy. One night of her leaving him was enough to make him realize what she really meant to him.

The only other thing that was quite unbelievable was the fact that he appeared to have fallen deeper for Abigail, much more than they ever thought. Alex, not even lasting one night of being separated from her, was proof of that.

"It seems like he has forgotten everything else and Abigail is the only one he sees and thinks about right now," Kai continued, looking glad but worried at the same time, as he glanced at Zeke.

"Seems like it. I wonder if this is fine, though." Xavier said, as he too glanced at Zeke. But the man didn't say anything. His face didn't give anything away. "But, don't you guys think Alex seemed a little out of it?"

Xavier was looking at Kai because he wasn't expecting Zeke to speak even a single word. He was already used to that treatment from that guy, but then, unexpectedly, Zeke actually butted in.

"When a super volcano, that had been sleeping for too long, erupts for the very first time, the eruption will be colossal... unstoppable, merciless, and even if it destroys itself in the process, it wouldn't care," he muttered and then he quietly stood up and left, leaving Xavier and Kai in the room, with drooped shoulders, as they leaned on the couch, watching his retreating back.

"Geez... that guy. I really think Zeke needs something or someone that could trigger him so he could erupt too, right? Kai? I want to see him go crazy as well. I'm tired of seeing his damn poker face! Geez..."


Alex stood by the door, looking up at the opened window of her room. He was wearing a black suit but his tie was gone and the collar of his white shirt was unbuttoned.

Alex walked towards the door to the house and knocked on it. The door opened almost immediately.

"You're here, Alexander. I've been waiting for you." Andrew stood aside and made room for Alex to come in. He then told Alex that he was leaving for work now and that he was leaving Abi to him. Andrew also told him that his mother and father were out for the day before he finally left.

Alex could only watch the door once Andrew was gone. Abi's father didn't even let him speak.

Alex stood there quietly for a while before he finally went upstairs but to his surprise, Abi was still sleeping and the only movement in the room was her yellow curtain dancing with the wind.

Quietly, Alex walked closer to her and sat on the edge of her bed. He stared at her face and he noticed how pale she was. Her lips were almost colorless and her eyes were a little swollen. His eyes scorched with a burning emotion as he stared at her and he gently caressed her cheek with the back of his fingers.

Abi didn't wake up for hours and when she did, it was already late in the day. The rain was falling quietly and the breeze that blew past her face was cold. However, her body felt warm, so warm that she wanted to fall asleep again.

When she tried to move, she finally noticed the weight wrapped around her. Her heart accelerated as she slowly turned. Alex?!

Abi was surprised to see him in her bed, hugging her and sleeping so peacefully. Her heart fluttered as it ached seeing his gorgeous, perfect face. She never expected Alex to appear in her room in the early hours of the morning after she left him. She thought that she would never see him again. She thought she would never touch him ever again. She thought that it was all over, that they were over. But then, he suddenly appeared in her room and told her those words. Those words that she thought she would only hear in her dreams.

This warmth, these feelings, she felt like she was finally home and she felt like crying again. It's only been 24 days since she started living with him, yet he had already become her new home. She didn't know how it happened but she realized just how powerful love was, to have actually made Alex her universe in such a short period of time.

Caressing every contour of his face like she was trying to memorize every little detail, Abi smiled. She stayed like that for an indefinite amount of time. She didn't want to look away or pull away from his embrace.

But she was thirty so she slowly moved and slipped away from his embrace. She carefully put her feet down on the floor, being very careful not to wake him up.

She was about to stand when suddenly, something made her halt. She froze as her eyes widened seeing something new on top of her bedside table.

The lamp there was gone and what replaced it was a round shaped aquarium. There were three small jellyfishes swimming majestically inside, looking so breathtaking. Abi's mouth hung open, her eyes filled with wonder and surprise.

Once she snapped out of her daze, she immediately knelt on the floor, almost sticking her face on the tank. Her eyes were alight with awe and wonder as she watched the cute jellyfish, as they danced peacefully inside, as the lights of the aquarium changed colours.

"Do you like it?" a hoarse voice jolted her and she turned to him with a big smile.

"They're so beautiful, Alex!" she exclaimed and Alex's lips curved up in satisfaction.